Last night, baby A was being difficult. He fell asleep at 7.30 p.m. and suddenly he woke up, cried and screamed around 9 p.m for hours. He wanted me to sleep with him, whenever I tried to leave his room, he pulled me and asked me to hug him. As he fell asleep, I tried to leave again and he started crying and screaming again and again. So I stayed, slept next to me and hug him.
Suddenly, it struck me that baby A needs me and I am lucky enough to be alive. What if that time, I really die? Who will be with him? Who will raise him? A new mother? A single father? I cannot think about that.
A good friend then said to me today “Next time, suicidal thought comes across to your head, just hug baby A. Our children are our protector.”