It’s not that I am getting pregnant.
I DON’T LIKE kids. Or in a stronger word, I’d say I HATE kids. Sometimes, kid appears as a monster to me especially when they start to running around, crying and screaming.
“Oh… just take those kids from here!” that’s what I always said to myself whenever I hear a kid starts to crying out loud in the church or restaurant.
That is why I always hate if people start to ask me “When are you going to have a baby?” or when people start to say to me “Congratulation! I hope you both have a baby soon.” It would just ruin my mood in a second.
But somehow, I have a desire to have a baby lately. Wait a second! I asked myself “Really? I wanna have a baby now? Are you serious Fani?” I smiled then frowned.
DON’T WANNA GET FAT
I saw many women are getting fat as soon as they have a baby and it seems to be a nightmare for me. I just hate the idea of purchasing clothes in a bigger size, I would start getting crazy.
I just don’t want to purchase clothes in Medium or even Large size while I always purchase it in extra small, small or zero size. I just don’t wanna get fat. This is one the scariest nightmare that I don’t wanna have even in my wildest dream. I just don’t wanna happen it to myself. Why? It is because I have maintained my body and watch out my diet.
“Don’t worry! You can go to gym and get slim! Don’t you see that your friend, Sita, is a perfectly slim as a mother for 6 years old girl. She is only 43 kg. If she can stay slim as a mother, you can do it as well.” a part of me said to myself.
“What about your high heels? What about your stiletto? What about your red sole? What about your nice and sexy dresses? When you are pregnant, you won’t be able to wear them.” I said to myself while I was staring at my wardrobe and shoes collections.
Dont’ worry about it! Some of the so-called-famous people were doing fine when they got pregnant. Kim Kardashian still wears a pair of Céline point-toe shoes in Paris on her early pregnancy. Amber Rose still stays fashionable during her pregnancy. So does Beyonce Knowles-Carter. So don’t be worried to much about it!
Oh well, being pregnant does’t mean that I cannot stay fashionable and stylist. Right? Even though, I really don’t wanna get fat.
I WANNA BE AN ACTIVE PERSON
Whenever I saw a pregnant woman, it seems to me that it is very difficult for them to moving around and doing as many activities as they want especially when the baby bump gets bigger.
Later as soon as the baby is being delivered, it seems that woman must spend most of her time to take care of the baby.
“What about my work? What about the idea of taking my master degree? What about the gym? What about my social life? What about dancing in the night club? What about going shopping for hours? What about traveling?” part of me getting afraid as if getting pregnant will just stop me of doing anything.
“Just relax woman!” I said to myself.
Getting pregnant and having a baby do not mean that it will stop you from doing all the activities that you need to do. You still can work, you still go to the gym and take a class for pregnant woman and other activities that you wanna do. Even though, you might be gonna do it in a different way.
Few months ago, I had a conversation with my best friend, who is a father of two sons. I asked him how difficult it is to be a parent. “It takes a big responsibility. Children often changed your priority and point of view of life.” he said to me.
Oh well, I am not sure if I am ready to getting pregnant and having a baby in the near future. But sooner or later, it will happen to me and I should not be afraid of it because there are so many challenges of life that we must face it and it is just one of them.
One thing that I must remember that child is a blessing from God.
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.- Psalm 127: 3-5
1. Picture was taken from Beauty News NYC